Why do my orgasm prompt her to begin using babytalk EVERYTIME?!
I am SOOO high
tell me about your high
HUGE THUMBTACKS
it wasn't sex, it was awkward naked time.
she just asked me to help her create a twitter page for edward cullen's hair.... seriously.
Sarah Palin is going to have a show on the discovery channel...Can I get a moment of silence for knowledge?
while cleaning my room, i've found many wonderful things. one of these is the card you gave me for my eighteenth birthday. it's a christmas card that says "i want to stick it in your sponger"
there are too many children here to make this hangover-friendly
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
Do you want the something i can tell my mom in ten year version or the you're gonna call me a whore but be proud version?
Thanks, college. Tonight's decisions brought to you by margs in a nalgene.
I'm trying not to drink. I may fall down if I move. This is bad. I had everclear before the bar. Oh no. Oh no. Breathe. Breathe. Breathe.
They left at like 4. I got up to help clean their house this morning and we found his pants. No ones heard from him, we're all a little scared.
He took off his priest costume and proceeded to dryhump the teletubby.
HE ASKED IF I HAD SIBLINGS WHEN I ASKED HIM TO LICK MY ASSHOLE
Please tell me why we have been neighbors since elementary school and waited until the night before I moved to fuck.
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