glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
i'm sorry if your life is a sore subject
Just got mistaken for a cardboard cutout ad in line at Taco Bell. New low?
of course. lets lasso hookers.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All the girls at the party had American flag thongs on... Pretty impressed with coordination seeing as how impromptu this event was
Showering in my swimsuit in hopes of getting the beer smell out.
If it snows I'm just gonna sit at my house in my costume and drink beer by myself all night.
You then showed up downstairs in only a robe, telling everyone how you were "the most chivalristic fratstar ever."
Currently playing charity bingo with coworkers so if u were ever gonna send a dick pic now is the time
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I knew my bag made it because I could smell the fireball that spilled inside of my suitcase before it was on the luggage carousel.
last night you told me I had a dark, salty butthole
I was having a serious heart-to-heart, and then the weed gummy kicked in.
these past three weeks have been a real "fuck you" to my liver
Im just drunk enough to admit that I miss Hannah Montana.
Just letting you know that while you peed your pants in that guys jeep, The orgasm I had made my hair fall out... Good morning.
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