Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
You are an awful beat friend I am goin to die in a car accident and then my corpse is going to be used by criminals ala weekend at bernies to rob a bank then my corpse will go to jail Thanks john Thanks for nuthin
i just practiced my bj skills on a banana in front of the mirror
its going to be a good night
Can you tell me we didn't drink from a fish bowl we found in the bathroom last night? I know it would be a lie; I just need to hear it.
gin and tonic in a mug. no limes so im using canned madarin oragnes. classy or trashy?
homeless.
I just googled "buy xanax online". What is wrong with my life?
Made a visit to my old puking stall. I missed it.
Nothing good has ever or will ever come from 50 cent beers at the bowling alley..
So, do you think I should wash the ashes off of my forehead before going to the strip club?
My head feels like a nest made of hair and cum
we have what I like to call an assload of ramen noodles
I want this pizza in and around my mouth forever..
FYI brushing your teeth & taking off your makeup does not erase the shame from the night before
What do you think would be the best way to remove a baby carrot from a vagina?
Why is my belly button ring in my ear
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