I need to talk to you about an important matter involving lesbians.
Alcohol only hurts me because he loves me.
Being pregnant is so damn inconvenient for my sex life.
I just googled "buy xanax online". What is wrong with my life?
you told his mom that the only thing he wants for christmas is his dick in your mouth
so the photographer said "let's get a picture of the cousins" so we posed together, and then he said " lets get a picture of the couples" So we posed together.
Bryan's allergic to that cheap detergent, so he's been naked for three days. But we're all used to it now, so the party is still on.
i got up, ate a McDouble, then went straight back to bed.
You sure know how to make a day worth living.
Don't I can pass these orgasm blushes off as sunburn for much longer...
hell or highwater he WILL get a blowjob in the hammock before the end of summer.
He asked me to come stay with him so he could "see that ass and watch Harry Potter."
Matched with the lumberjack. Here's your wedding invite.
She said my penis was powerful and magnificent
You sat outside petting a picture of your cat for hours... not even the real thing... just a picture.
I know it sounds cheesy, but i think both me and her mum know they are "thanks for being so cool about finding nudes of your daughter on the camera" flowers
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