Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
Dude it was weird. The strippers vagina tasted kind of like your mother's.
christmas break will be like the 25 days of orgasms
i thought i'd fucked her to death. no lie. she just stopped moving.
There's just something about sucking a flaccid dick that makes me feel so calm. Like a baby cow..
I walked in and you were laying on the floor bleeding everywhere half asleep half crying and moe was at the kitchen table eating frozen pizza refusing to acknowledge you. What a sight.
Are we doing anything tonight after class for Valentine's Day or just being lazy and having sex?
If you expect me to say anything other than 'lazy and sex' you're crazzzzy!
Sorry, all I could picture was you jamming your dick into a lemon.
By the way, do you realize that you asked me how much you could get for your eggs last night. And once you learned the price said that you had plenty to share.
Literally too hungover to clean. I'll get the frosting off the table tomorrow, ok?
I'm going to be drunk and braless all weekend. Let the festivities begin!
He yelled "HOO-ah!" like Al Pacino when he pulled down his pants. Trust me, he has every right to.
I'm totally going to bang the cable guy tonight. I'm so pumped
I just realized I'm having shark week, during shark week.
I'm not drinking for the rest of the week. I need discipline, celery, dick, and a bible.
Randomize
