Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
Jack off faster Americas best dance crew is beyonce themed
My cousin's dog just exhaled smoke. My job here is done.
just threw all of the fireworks into the bonfire. thats why there are firetrucks.
I definitely hasselhoffed a taco bell burrito on my kitchen floor in front of my dad and little brother.
Gold rum. Strong marijuana. Jabba the Hut in stilettos. Deep thigh bruise. Yes, thal all happened. Sorry dude.
MANGO MOTHERFUCKING GODDAMN MARGARITA DELICIOUSNESS
oh god my hair smells like rotten vegetables, sweat, and tequila. I wanna party with your neighbors every night.
So, I'm drinking, and I put my head down in the table. The cat jumped up to check on me, I have a cat sober monitor.
You can fuck me but I'm keeping my parka on.
just tried to scoop ice cream with a steak knife. now in the emergency room with a the cab diver and the drag queen he picked up on the way. its gonna be a loooong day.
Tbh I fell asleep cuddling a bag of Brazilian nuts. Franzia never dissappoints me
Sharknado 3 is going to bring us to alcoghol poisonign
I've decided I will have no shame for the things I don't remember doing.
look im sitting on my bathroom floor in my underwear snorting cocaine can we talk about this later
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