I just spent the night with a bunch of indian guys and i wasn't attracted to a single one. Yeah i've officially become an anti-indian indian.
her vagine was all disorganized.
I need to have sex with someone before he does. I need to win this break up!
Today was the day I stopped kidding myself and started buying the handle of vodka.
i wont go near him until the smell goes away , and he takes the chex mix box off his head.
i think that dennys waitress has my boxers
and if my full six pack comes in by Halloween there is no stopping the man slut costume. I have no shame
I have a pocket in my purse that is just for condoms and cocktail swords. I feel like that speaks volumes about me as a person
Dude you ate toast sprawled out on my kitchen floor and said "this is comfy". No more day drinking.
He threw a twenty at the stripper and asked for change
well did he get it
....yes
I'm gonna have to shit in a bar again tonight
You squatted and peed on the living room floor while maintaining eye contact with Sebastian
Why are my jeans soaking wet and smell like chlorine??
Bc u told a stranger in the hotel "I have sinned' and made him get into the hotel fountain and "baptize u". I've got a vid
I've given up on the male species, I'm just going to be a lonely whore for the rest of my life.
Puked in my purse on my Uber ride home last night. Safe to say it's not a good idea to beer bong a whole bottle of wine.
Randomize
