The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
Just saw my neighbor passed out in his front yard, leg stretching into the road. Full beer in his hand.
Put your dick on his face to wake him up, dont worry its fine.
She asked how far humans have gone into a volcano because they did in spy kids. She was serious.
Afterwards she kept poking it and saying "it looks so sad and small" I dont know if I wanted to reach this state in our relationship...
throwing up in the shower isnt as glamorous as i expected
since when the fuck is that glamorous?
Do your friends by chance have our inflatable deer head?
Nevermind, it's in the dryer.
P.S. I just watched The Muppets. I feel like I just got a sadness enema.
I keep confusing the name of her and her dog. Both are appropriate.
That doesn't mean I'm a slut. Unless McFlurries are involved.
I will rub McFlurries all over you.
I just want to have such an intense orgasm that my heart stops and I die. I mean that would kind of suck for the guy I'm fucking but then again he could be like "I'm that good"
She was trying to drink out of the beer bong and she thought it didn't work. Little did she know there was no beer in there. Then she got mad at us. Girls.
I'm so lazy and tired i just want to cry and fall asleep in a bed of egg mcmuffins.
How much booze could a drunk brad chug when a drunk brad does chug booze?!?
All. The answer is always all
Your amazing boobs made me fall in love with boobs. I never cared about boobs you should be proud
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