Billy Mays died!
I know. And the US is beating brazil...what's wrong with the world?
DO IT!!! IT MUST BE FATE THAT I GAVE YOU THAT CONDOM!!!!
If there's ever a time when I've matured to the point that I don't want to look at camera-phone-titties, go ahead and bury me in a shallow grave by the railroad tracks.
found a cell phone. in the freezer. wrapped in bologna. explain?
what the fuck is a social media consultant, who does she consult for, and how bad is she at it? her facebook account is currently hacked and posting ads for the ipad 2 on my newsfeed
Well THAT'S the last time I buy beer and baby wipes in the same Walmart run ... just wanted to shout I USE THEM TO REMOVE MY MAKEUP, YOU ASSHOLES
I walked around with red solo cups on my feet, weeds tied around my neck and a tree in my hand
I just want to pat him on the head, bake him some cookies, and reassure him that, someday, he will get laid.
Out of curiosity, do you feel happiness for you, or sadness for ME, that you are the only one I drunk text?
I realize designer coke was a douchey thing to say but the point of the story is I did bath salts
Grandma's bordering on serious shit show territory at this point.
I mean I did fuck her boyfriend, the least I could do is post happy birthday on her Facebook wall.
I wish I was taller so I could give these boobs the publicity they deserve.
It wasn't my fault.
You let her suck your neck. Yes it was your fault.
got cock blocked by the cops again. two of the cops were the same ones from that t bell incident and they recognized me... they still dont like me
Randomize
