Do you remember last night at all? Be honest
I need to look at the pictures on my camera to fill in the gaps.
Spotted: Pepto Bismol pink Scion with Ed Hardy sticker on front window, air freshener, and seat covers. Total Douchette Mobile.
cruising supermarkets, asking random people where i can get weed. fuck alaska
we just watched the ball drop on the spanish channel. best mistake of my life.
Correct me if I'm wrong, but I did not stop moving last night. If tequila gives me that extra push to have an active lifestyle, so be it.
So my nipple piercings were only $20 because it's breast cancer awareness month. Fuck yes!
Wake your ass up this is a day of horror where we get horroibly drunk and sleep with tandom dudes who wish they were super heros ps i havr stuffed animals over my privates im a petting zoo this year
We got out of the car in valet drinking beers we gave the valet one as a tip
Had a crazy moment last night. Had to get up, run to bathroom, pop 3 Xanax, sit on bathroom floor and rock myself in fetal position. Not my best moment.
I made everything so magnificently awkward in under 15 seconds. I am magic.
That's good. Don't want to see you bellydancing in prison for homemade wine.
I just need to stick to one night stands and delete social media
Did you just email Kelly and I gay dinosaur erotica?
Ok, now help me add to my topless picture collection, i'm going to make myself a calendar
I'm going to leave the 5 dollars that fell out of my bra while fucking in his room on the dresser as an apology
Randomize
