I'm gonna do things to you that will make the neighbors want to move.
I sometimes wonder how many of the girls I know have done anal...and why none of them have ever dated me.
is it bad if my mug shot looks better than my profile picture?
The is a pregnant woman in this Chipolte wearing a shirt that simply says ‘OOPS!’ across the tummy.
That baby is bound to be under-loved.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sober me does NOT approve of what went on in my pants last night.
Porch rule of tonight: when you sing, you must use "something" as a microphone. The person to use the most "creative" object gets the door prize...so far Stephie is winning with Jennifer's dog.
It's like a squid of pain has attached to my head and it spreading it's whorey tentacles all over.
Who knew drunk me could climb a 17 story building for apple juice and sex
She acts like a 3 year old but with fantastic tits. This girl is the reason women are objectified
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My dick was almost in plain McDonald's sight
You forgot the part where I played Slip and Slide with my own puke and fucked up my knee.
Basically one minute I'm sucking on her nipples and then 45 mins later we're at work and she's my boss.
Girl, he's like catnip for my pussy.
Give it up bro. I’m not wearing pants or a bra and only an act of god could change that
YOU'RE NOT THE ONE BEING EVISCERATED BY YOUR OWN UTERUS SO GET SOME DAMN SLEEP YOU FOOL!
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