i want to open my blinds to let the sunlight in my room, but i'm afraid my neighbors will be able to see me drinking and judge me
That's why girls suck all the time. Blah blah nag nag drama drama buy me things but I won't touch your penis
Sometimes to bang a cougar u gotta play wii With her kids
I feel like I should I write an apology note to the frat for falling down stairs, passing out on the couch, and chugging the entire bottle of burnetts at semiforml last weekend. Apparently I was the main topic of discussion at their chapter meeting last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just saw 30+ dicks. Explain later.
They woke me up at 6am and made me drink a bottle pf champagne yelling "champagne breakfast!"
take 2 Ambien then drink a Red Bull and watch Alice in Wonderland. Trust me.
The thumbs up barstamp on my hand is mocking my hangover with its positivity.
I will not be held responsible for my vagina's poor judgment.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
IT'S A FUCKING GIANT POKEBALL MAD OUT OF TINY ROSES
After a roaring rendition of Jay-Z's "99 Problems but a bitch ain't one" I ended up making her cry on her birthday.
Is it festive if I masturbate to Santa porn?
I seriously need to grocery shop. I have a slice of cheese, and alcohol.
Yea...Let's just say I gave her the best 3 and half minutes of her life then she took a 40 minute cab ride home that she paid for...
So apparently I’m into choking now
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