Just had to reach into my sister's bag and shut off her vibrator so my parents wouldn't hear it. I am the world's greatest brother.
he was sending me dirty texts but i was watchin nickeloden and couldnt get into it
im ashamed your my cousin
i think our first tip to leave should have been when we saw the drinks were coming out of a gas can
He told me I took off my shirt, asked for the latino thunder and jumped on him. I want to question this but it sounds too much like me.
I remember sitting there at the toilet, bleeding everywhere and thinking, "I walked from my bedroom to here. What happened?"
I broke down outside of an all boys correctional facility
well if that's not a gay porn waiting to happen, i dont know what is...
Drinking vodka straight from my water bottle because of the debate. I just need to forget.
I let a drunk, gay man in a dragon costume motor-boat me. With his dragon head.
There's a cop, a pizza guy and a half naked girl outside along with a dog that I don't know. It feels like I walked into a Judd Apatow movie.
smoked four grams out of a bong with a mixture of pool water and white rum. I applaud you for leaving before losing too many brain cells.
I'm straight up riding in the back of my truck in a bean bag chair right now. Feet propped up and four loko in hand. Glorious.
you gave a quesadilla a blow job with sour cream at Denny's.
They had to take me to the ER because I got a concussion in a parking garage. Not partying with lesbians for a while
If TJ is short for Trader Joe, I'm gonna fuck him
Do you think if I explain to her I want to have loud, unprotected sex with her sister she'll understand?
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