did i leave my keys in your car? BTW: sorry for throwing that drink on your date.
I had sex with billy mayes last night. HE KEPT IN CHARACTER THE WHOLE TIME.
I cannot stress to you how much better your current situation is than listening to gay sex
Some guy said that sham wows were the same as regular shammys. needless to say you had to be restrained. you kept trying to 'slap chop' him.
just gave a yankee's fan wrong directions to Fenway....welcome to boston asshole
You know the gilmore girls would be alright if it was on mute the whole time
doing lines of blow through a tampon applicator in the study lounge at 7am so i can finish an italian composition that was due a week and a half ago...such a good student.
Do you remember giving me altiods and wishing me good luck on the walk home?
are you aware you chucked your pizza at a girl's face after the bar last night?
Minus the pink eye. Do I look fuckable tonight?
I decided tomorrow is going to be great day wether my period likes it or not
Makes Sense, i generally dont want the same person two days in a row. Its like what i pick for supper, i like variety
Don't. You get on the 18 year old. I'll get on the 38 year old. Together we will bridge 2 decades of cock.
Are you sure he's still you're boyfriend when you're sober?
Plus he probably didn't want to be at home, alone... Jacking off on the big screen without you there to lend a helping hand. I mean, let's be honest. It's not fun if it's not a little weird.
Randomize
