chick flicks and taylor swift songs are like porn for desperate singles
office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
Black thong, sheer white shorts not a professional look. This chick has no idea what sunlight makes her outfit look like.
so sad. i just ate the last good 'n' plenty out of the bottom of my purse.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
her dad is making me watch Glen Beck, i only agreed because i penetrated his daughter earlier.
You watched "From Justin to Kelly" and sang along to more than half of the songs. I didn't know whether to laugh or to be insanely frightened that you knew almost all the lyrics.
he keeps trying to sext me and all I can do is respond with descriptions of what im eating.
When I left you, you were walking into a room with a half naked girl. When I returned 2 minutes later, you were locked out of the room naked and she was screaming obscenities from inside. How do you manage to make every girl hat you?
Look, I'm just saying... paying ur respects to the neighbors who had a death in the family with food u steal from the neighbors having the cookout may result in a negative karma situation.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We held a candle light vigil outside the jail hoping for her release, until we realized we were drunk in the jail parking lot.
how is it that I keep meeting up with you when Im drunk?
you stand on my porch screaming my name until I come out with you...
We went to Olive Garden so high we didn't talk and managed to be awkward enough for the waiter to ask if it was our first date
Just taxi'd to the airport holding a zip lock bag of my own vomit. Bachelorette success.
Do it break your family into faction start a civil war
did i tell you guys i finally 69’d for the first time last night? just thought the group chat should know.
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