Yeah, we realized keeping you in a cage wasn't beneficial to us
dude just tell them you don't wear clothes. they'll understand
you know when i was in school the girls definitely did not have the tits the 15 year olds have now. so unfair.
know what turns me on? long, stringy hair on a pasty looking girl with an overstuffed backpack and kneepads over her jeans in case she falls off her scooter
your less of a man for seeing that
We're like two naked peas in a sex pod.
It was like stroking your vagina with a cloud.
I like to think it's an accomplishment that I can relate my life to a T-pain song
Just woke up in my fuck buddies bed with, from the looks of her ass and side boob, a girl that is not my fuck buddy. This should be interesting
For the sake of being nice I congratulated her and she replied with something along the lines of that I need to stay away from him and not touch him ever. I really wanted to be like "been there, done that" but my New Years resolution was to not start any cat fight over boys with small dicks before noon
My body hates me. Pretty sure I drank 3 pitches full of coffee last night and took two adderal. I slept and ran a marathon at the same time. You should see my bed.
I stepped in puke last night then washed it off my shoe with beer. Is there a grace period to respect before wearing them to class?
Is it weird to befriend your older alcoholic landlords?
I'm touching everything in your apartment with my penis.
Fun fact: I came home from the riverboat without my panties. And woke up with a different pair on.
He puked all over the side of the car and the head rest behind him...and then all he said was "America."
Randomize
