I woke up and she had breakfast in bed for me
RUN RUN RUN RUN
oh great. the only prospects for sex left for the night are douchebag in the ed hardy shirt & frodo-looking ass
fuck it... i'll be the lord of his rings
six shots in, he is hammered and doing stretches before each shot
So I'm really hungover walking to work and these douches from comcast on bikes ask if they can take a picture with me to show that they're doing their job. The picture: me, this chick from comcast, i'm holding a 2 ft. pixie stick, a comcast flyer and i'm puking in the parking lot. sounds like their doing a good job!
We can't have sex anymore. The amount of money I've spent on meds and copays for UTIs is getting ridiculous
Ya know, in a round about way coinstar is just a glorified vending machine for all my bad choices.
Made a visit to my old puking stall. I missed it.
She grabbed both of our dicks in the pool then said repeatedly, "this is my dream, this is my dream,"
Last night in my drunkenness I bought hurricane supplies which included a jug of wine and a bouquet of flowers. Apparently I'm going to woo Irene.
Pretty sure the nurse said at one point I was in full restraints because I tried surfing my stretcher
I really dont wanna go to a traffic light party. I have nothing red to pretend I'm taken with. Without something red my "my girlfriend is away in the mines" story wont work.
Well she got high, deleted the essay she was working on, and then ordered dominos. We all manage stress in different ways.
What did you two do last night and why did Sam send me a picture of your dick?
Had to decide between a hook up at the train restroom or getting to work on time #growingup
At least you got some excitement going on, you got weed and might die tonight, I'm just sitting here bored as fuck.
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