Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
Drunk fuck. Had to tell him that the 5 second rule does not apply when your in the bathroom at the hockey game.
He brought a TOOTHBRUSH and TOOTHPASTE with us on our date..... I want to go home and forget I ever decided to be nice and go on this date in the first place...... A TOOTHBRUSH!?!?!
watched two friends get underages. one had a shirt on that said lets get wasted while the other said to the cop "i understand your just trying to do your job but that was dirty bro".
ASS. GYMANSTICS. OLYMPICS. NOW!!!
Don't matter if she's straight, I'll get her. I'm not called The Transformer for nothing
I wouldn't know what to do. You never really mentally prepare for a cactus getting thrown at your face.
We can't do acid Disneyworld.
I was gonna respond but i couldnt figure out a way to rearrange 'fuck his brains out' to sound grammatically correct
Oh my god the guy at DQ just gave me the number 69 and winked at me
Did you hear about the guy wearing a spiderman mask running around naked with a bottle of patron?
Yeah.
I was spiderman.
I can't dude. Last time I was there, I blew the bartender in the bathroom at last call.
the girl who hid my weed when the cops came has a birthday coming up. i feel like i should get her something.
He is 6'5, went to a Christian school and he's a violinist....I'm going to fuck the jesus right out of him.
you going clubbing tonight?
well its tuesday isnt it
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