Drawing on your hand and calling it yenifer lopez doesn't count!
Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
I'm 90% sure a girl here is wearing a bra strap as a headband.
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
I am literally too baked to press the call button. How am I supposed to bone him?
She loves me even though she knows all Ive done. Shes kind of like jesus.
nothing like walking down the street with a garbage bag of puke trying to find a dumpster
In case you come back to the room and i'm not here, yes there's a cup filled with gravy in the microwave. Just take it out if you need to heat something.
I was just tagged in a picture with a bunch of people i don't know in a house i don't recognize wearing a purple cowboy hat and a boa...i hate tequila
I came home wearing somebody's thong. If you're missing one message me privately.
When one of my seniors asked "Rough night?" I realized my poor decisions involving Tuesday night drinking did not go unnoticed.
Lying naked in bed eating carrot cake of off my bare breasts while watching Family Guy. Tonsilitis isn't all bad!
Just took adderall with about half a bottle of red wine...i have stopped trying for this last exam
I was writing 'DISTRACTION' across my chest in Sharpie when my boob fell out. Right on camera.
And now Google thinks I have a hard hat fetish...maybe I do...
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