Is it bad everytime a fat person orders fraps I want to tell them to slow their rolls
not my fault. i got her to believe he wrote an oasis song. he still managed to find a way to make sure no girl ever gets near his penis.
new level of vanity: sex dreams about deep throating myself...
At what point are you a chubby chaser or just desperate for sex?
shes the only person ive ever met that could make "i don't swallow" sound sexy
i feel as uncomfortable as your camel toe looks.
For the record, saying you're friends with the owner doesn't work when the owner is the one throwing you out.
A guy just walked down the street dressed as Mickey Mouse holding a 40oz. Where the hell did you leave me?
I just sold my hat for three car bombs. I call that a win.
Dude. The amount of love and appreciation from a house full of stoners when you come home at 4 am with donuts is overwhelming. The kind of love to make Jesus have to work a little harder at his unconditional love thing.
He started tongueing his parfait and told "thats what I'd to your ass" in the middle of Starbucks. Of course i brought him home
I haven't even sucked a boob is 6 weeks I hate not college
I made out with the uber driver for free weed, I thought he deserved it
You just kept looking down at your tits and screaming "I LOVE YOU TWO!!!"
Tomorrow night, I am putting you In my trunk. No excuses we have waited forever for this.
Randomize
