Just mADE A PArabola og urine
Maybe he just has a boisterous penis
is cock-oriented a word? I'd say I'm that lately.
He raised his arm and dropped it in his sleep to smack himself awake. He knows his phone has an alarm clock right?
This is what you sent me from the other side of the pool, "Idk but thers a pool n l wanna get naked take off my trunks ill paddle with my dick"
Like please, take your microdick and try to stick it someplace else. It is not welcome in my world.
Just participated in the saddest thing: Cheetos. Handjob. I have lost at life
I literally just rubbed my stomach and told my liver to "hang in there baby"
You're talking about alcohol when the smell of hand sanitizer is too much for me right now
You're right. Cause really... I'm in the back of his head. Even though what I said was better than "I have herpes"... I did once say that to him. So I'm like a reoccurring nightmare.
I have successfully trained your dog to bring me pudding cups!
I will be wearing a suit out more cuz it has been decided i rage harder with a power tie
I woke up with a treasure map drawn on my ass. Whattt.
I really regret not asking “like a cupcake” when you asked me to eat your ass
Last night I actually told him I came with a washer and dryer
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