They keep asking what you are doing. I told them to quit calling her "what."
it wasnt like "sexy" or whatever. like...she was smiling just standing there butt ass naked
tasteful.
You tipped the bathroom lady $20 and then yelled "IT'S YOUR LUCKY DAAAAAAAY" at her.
Just a heads up. Everytime I get arrested in Maine I claim I lost my ID and use your name.
Watching water boil has never been so amazing. I love wake-and-bakes.
There was just way too much discussion about my penis at that party
Like I said I'm looking on the bright side. The bright side just happens to be filled with penis attached to hot marines
They wouldn't let me hang out the sun roof and sing apple bottom jeans in the drive thru of hardee's i think i no longer like these ppl
We drove around last night shotting fireworks out the window while they had sex in the back of his car
So we just left her at the hospital. She is not ruining my Monday night
You handed me a red solo cup filled with vodka and Bacon. You called it the salty Russian.
iphones do not disturb setting is the biggest cock block to my 3am booty calls
C'mon pople!!! THursday afternoon isnot gonna drinkin itself!!!
Nothing like having your house arrest ankle bracelet vibrate and take a moisture sample at the exact moment you're about to blow it in some chick...buzzkill
No worries I have vodka. Its always on time
Randomize
