I feel miserable, can't drink that much when I go out
We've been saying that since '98
FYI, if you pee in my bed (or even let R___ and E___ sleep in it), I will fart loudly during your wedding vows. Trust.
regular news: took many shots of tequila.....bad news: woke up with a toothbrush and vagisil next to me.....good news: clean as a whistle
Two bottles of champagne and half a pizza later, I'm crying myself to tears watching The Nanny. Happy finals week.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sunshine is the equivalent of sprinkling whore pellets on campus.
If you're knocked up, we're telling everyone it's mine and that the power of our love overcame the inherent reproductive limitations of two vhagines.
where are you?
talk to ya later, gotta sled down these stairs real quick
An image of us stuck like that like Pompeii comes to mind. A wonder for future anthropologists
I think we've entered a low point in our relationship when I'm sending you pictures of pubic hair designs "because they're funny"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
three guys with a tattoo of the Walmart rollback smiley holding up a middle finger on their ass=free drinks in every bar
Started the 4th with a foursome. I don't know if it gets more festive than that. #MERICA
We were sad, then we got horny, and then we needed some ranch
My dad told me I would need to be my mom's DD tonight. So, that's how my Easter weekend is going down.
Every time I try to do something productive I end up searching ghost porn.
Hes back in his dorm room dancing naked with 3D glasses on.
and he said that acid doesnt really do anything to him...
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