i just saw a midget buying condoms and graham crackers. i wonder which was the impluse buy.
I feel like the only solution to this is to get naked and lay in the shower for a hour then see what my penis wants to do.
but then the words kidney pain and possible testicle shrinkage kept ringing in my head
Just signed my boyfriend up on a dating website so I could officially have a reason to leave him for my hot neighbor.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just had someone I don't even know on Facebook message me saying it seems like I drink too much and should slow down.
Thinking about adopting a 16 yr old here. Her name is Abby and she likes vodka. We've bonded. I need a sober driver n e ways...
Think I just saw your homeless guy on High Street. Did you give him back his crutch?
I just learned a new drink. Sloppy Ninja. Half Saki Half Nyquil
Definitely just found that pen in the microwave. What the fuck.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Figured out how I got so much alcohol in my hair: tried to drink my drink using my cleavage as a cup holder. Missed my drink hole and got it all in my hair
Literally got mad at him this morning because we didn't have time to have sex for a third time. I think I'm getting greedy.
He thought I was gay. I had to explain I just really like wearing flannel.
Our relationship revolved around Taylor Swift albums. It's no wonder it ended so fast
If by fun you mean, did I meet her cousin for the.first time and bang him, then yes it was a productive evening.
One day I'm going to get tired of waking up and wondering where the glow sticks on the floor came from.
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