I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
i hate this light. i wouldnt even hook up with me in this light
I'm so drunk I cant read cursive anymore.
im letting my talent of no gag reflex go to waste
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
its sad that the first thing i assume is that ur trying to indirectly tell me you fucked on a breakfast table
by asking you if you bought one for the apartment?
he just found out his girl is having a boy. he's probably googling "Ed Hardy diapers" as we speak.
what kind of dress can i wear to my high school reunion that says "even though i'm more successful than all of you i'm still up for sex"?
Come over and help me clean up your so-called "winter wonderland" that you made with the fire extinguisher in the kitchen last night.
i think he saw me take a picture of his dick
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I thought of you this morning when I woke up in a bed with a girl wrapped in duct tape dressed as a coors light can.
If your wondering why there is a puddle on the floor is I may have decided to make a kiddie pool in your living room.
I'm just gonna use that pot butter as dip for chips. That's fat, American AND stoner!
Within the first 2 minutes of this morning, I found out the Lions lost on last play, and Scott Weiland died. I wont be in today.
My boyfriend's mom is the manager of Wendy's. The same one I took a pregnancy test in.
Just letting you know that while you peed your pants in that guys jeep, The orgasm I had made my hair fall out... Good morning.
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