So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
Our professor just said "No class today, go get stoned." A guy seriously walked over and hugged him.
He told the cop he was underage, handed the cop his ID, and the police report read "I then informed the suspect that he was not, in fact, underage"
theres a kid in a leopard robe and sunglasses filling up a gas tank. i miss college
When did it become appropriate to call your mother the morning after? While still naked in bed? WHEN?!
Being the only woman in a triathlon group - it's a penis paradise.
I think my vagina is phsycic. All day it tingled and then BAM Channing Tatums look alike fucks me like ive never been fucked in my life.
Hypothetical Question: Would you take a cougar bullet for me?
In the world of sexual, erotic texting, you rank somewhere between "how much teeth do you want" and "how dry do you want it"
Ok I've processed it. Who the fuck makes out drunk in a parking lot in a backseat with the windows down in the middle of the day?!?!
Okay, first we buy a pirate outfit and then we get drunk, you in or you out?
There’s nothing that says motivation more than watching these little geniuses on Kids Baking Championship New Year’s Day. I’m ready to fuck shit up this year.
U were so upset when the shower ruined ur nachos. I didn't kno what to do.
Tonight is an "I'm lonely and single so I'm going to curl up in a warm, melatonin and vodka enriched ball in the corner of my bed with a cat." kind of night.
I woke up on the damn lawn again...it's not even summer yet
Randomize