yeah my walk of shame consisted of driving on the wrong side of the road at 6am still drunk with cum drying in my hair and left eye.
we didnt fuck last night. again. seriously, his place is like where dreams go to die.
see you put your penis in her and it's like an ignition key to start the crazy
He DELETED brick breaker off his blackberry why even bother trying to find something in common?
Just called my mom. She definitely saw all those fb statuses so thanks for that.
Haha did she know what fisting meant?
Yeah. Which is upsetting in itself
Fuck him for salsa, please. I heard its a good recipe.
Every time I get scared about the fact that I'm falling for him I remember that he juggles and is hung like a mastadon and everything is a-ok.
You need 4-7 business day to recover from a fingering like that.
hi sober isdnt real. this is a mass rtoomate taext i thing. bye
AMAZING.
I'm 11 for 13 getting drunker than the person who's birthday it is
I was drunk while I accepted my job offer. Here's to growing up.
so she gave me back a bag of clothing, had some boxers in it...they werent mine.... well that sums up 5 years of my life
we had sex in his office so i figured it was appropriate to like his company's page on facebook
I passed out with the lights and tv on woke up at 4am SO confused and covered in goldfish so I ate them and went back to bed.. fuck xanax
So my best friends wedding ended with everyone seeing me getting eaten out behind the forbes church. Classy!
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