her name is jenna, so i wanna cunt punt her
that's how i am about ashleys and britneys
I'm blazed at jack in the box and my order number is 420. I wish everything in the world made this much sense.
When she can manipulate the direction of her leg hair, you know its time to leave
Oh, and thanks to you. I'm now stuck in the living room, held hostage, listening to my roommate's "How I discovered I was bi" story. FUCK YOU.
Idgaf if he's a manwhore, he's like the mt. everest of penises. howcan I NOT try to put that inside me?
i just traded 2 rolls of toilet paper for half a water bottle of vodka. i love college
No, I don't not want an upside down piggyback ride. You're drunk and there are rocks.
Im down. Even tho your nick name intimidates my vagina.
I know, I know. But we've discussed my friends and appropriate social behaviour, and I'm pretty sure topless karaoke was a no-no.
he just kept texting even after we lit his shoelaces on fire. he just calmly walked into the pool... still texting.
Give me a reason to not spend the rest of my evening high watching dogs 101 videos
If my mom's not going to offer me drugs then it's really pointless for me to be here.
she definitely didn't appreciate it when you justified bringing her home by yelling to me "fat bitches need love too"
she threw up on her exam, awkwardly wiped it off with her sleeve and continued writing.
Is it bad that I'm not at all bothered by the fact that to some people I'm simply known as the girl that takes her shirt off?
Randomize