How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
dude do u know what u did last night?
do i wanna know???
you totally walked in on some couple fuckin in their unlocked dorm room asking for directions to ur room...
You're the end to all my bad dreams.
Did you have that reoccuring dream about me banging your mom again?
Abreva sucks. I applied it as directed and now it looks like I fed the herpes. They're throwing a party on my bottom lip.
The stories of what you did in Cuba got home before you.
She told me I made the cut, and to write my name and number on the white board by the door. I was the 7th number down.
did i really sing to your nipples last night?
yes. and it was oddly very seductive
So if I tell her fire is hot and it will burn her... she's probably just going to keep throwing her vagina at it huh?
Come in your red robin gear. If you smell like French fries we can make love.
Now I can't unsee my hot boss's under-boobs. Monday will be awkward.
Pics or STFU
yea sometimes its awkward. but when you're a straight bartender at a gay bar and everyone knows it, they all think that they can make me turn gay. its like oh yea dude that extra $20 tip makes me want to suck some dick now
After last night, I think I need a service animal to monitor the life choices I make when I'm inebriated. A monkey, or a clever dog. Or a really assertive parrot.
What have I told you about trying to use Jesus as your wingman?!
She's the prison bitch to my Martha Stewart.
I feel like i'm being yelled at when you type in all caps.Did you just have bad sex?
Randomize