Don't know whats worst me sharding on her a bit or her believing me when i told her she did it...
i feel like someone uncorked me like a wine bottle and pulled a living animal outta my arse.
Clearly, I'm already going to hell, so there's no point in trying anymore.
And next time please put a text between discussing my orgasms and discussing your son - that was weird.
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he's drinking beer at home in his underwear tonight and if you want to come over the dresscode is underwear only. And you have to bring beer.
i don't know what part of 'duct tape bikini waxes' seemed even a little okay in our drunk minds, but i'm never drinking with your sister again
Your message cut off at "shit on the floor". Your life is incredible.
As his dick went in he shouted GOAL at the top of his voice.
She just causally held my limp dick in her hand the entire movie. Her parents were cuddling on the couch too..that brave!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
But how will the next generation learn about life choices without a Jersery Shore?
Chick in the reindeer getup puked on Baby Jesus last night. But then she bought us all empanadas so she's cool.
I'm talking to a corgi on tinder..wtf has my life come to
He was doing dishes, naked. I dropped to my knees and gave him head. Teamwork level- pro..
Nothing screams "crazy cat lady" like a nursery in your house when you're over 30, single and have no kids.
Honestly, you can’t tell the whole sorority he has a donkey dick and expect that no one would sleep with him after you broke up
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