as for my dating sex life, no more regret sticks. Only pride wands from now on.
People in love make me want to vomit
$22.99 left in the bank til payday = 3($7 jack & coke) + 2($0.89 T-Bell taco) + $0.21 in case of emergency.
math is fun
Ever had blood in your semen? I am guessing that's a problem.
I think i can make this amish girl legitimately hot.
Transgendered man at work dawning a slutty batman costume. I hate Halloween
it's official, after last weekend my girl number is higher than my guy number. fix this.
In a car. Threw up in my mouth. Haven't said a word in 10 minutes.
i just had to hear from a third party that he came inside of me
just saw someone climb out of the dumpster at cvs and start walking down the street like it was completely normal
i just remember explaining why my socks were better than everyone elses.
A gay guy went down on me in the club bathroom and then fixed my makeup for me
its gonna be a great night
People like you and me aren't meant to go this long without having sex
These guys are just fucking with my heart instead of fucking me. They're fucking up.
Complete and utter failure. 100% unsalvageable. I have not failed so hard at a culinary endeavor in YEARS. MY HONOR IS IMPUGNED I HAVE SHAMED MY HOUSE
Randomize
