Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
Do you ever creep on the girls you have banged and wondered how their walk of shame went?
How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
I just went to a subway where the girl didn't know how to make a blt. I will not miss public school texans.
Just took career test that listed librarian and bartender as top career choices. Fascinating.
I don't care if the man pisses on teenage girls, he's enchanting.
we got 12 live crabs and then we got really stoned and know we're playing with the crabs. thats nom watermellon nom. now i'm plaing with a crap whos such a gentleman
Is there a fine for having sex in the back of a zipcar?
Just me. You're probably having sex with her right now, so here's a reminder that you should be thinking of me per our agreement.
I am never going on a blind date ever again. He drank way too much and kept telling me I had a nice boob. Like.. Singular. What's the other one? The ugly twin?
my hand froze to the top of can of beer cuz i fell asleep outside. i decided to find a way to open the bottom of the can before addressing my severe frostbite. PRIORITIES!
He was chasing Ciroc shots with sips of Captain Morgan... he didn't make it to midnight
I don't know how that blunt survived being in your pocket all night but you pulled it out at 4 am in 7/11 and tried to fire it up. Zero fucks given
Sorry for trying to baptize you last night
You knew the entire thing in Latin I was so impressed
STOP SENDING ME NAKED PICTURES WHEN I'M TRYING TO TEACH. MONDAY TUESDAY 1-3 IS A DICK AND ARSE FREE ZONE
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