Goodnight my chunky, little, marshmallow muncher
he referred to my room as the tit cave...
well after this past weeked you can expect to see me on maury playing a little game called "who's the father"
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
I'm 99% sure I high fived a girl over mashed potatoes last night
Hey on the reals though tomorrow if i take you out to lunch as just a friend will you also suck my cock as just a friend?
Anything that comes outta your cooch is bound to be breathtaking
That could use a little rephrasing
what's the appropriate greeting for someone whose bed you've had sex with someone else in?
All I know is I want him to tie me up at least twice a week and I have an overwhelming urge to cook for him. Could this be love? I'm so confused....
I got my first tattoo & injured myself while having sex in a national monument. I say we consider this weekend siezed.
wanna see your best friend chug a bottle of steak sauce?
please go to sleep
Did I try to sell your body for chicken tenders last night?
So we were fooling around last night and suddenly Like A Virgin popped up on his itunes
OMG haha What did he say?
He told me that if I laughed, I would have to leave.
I will fuck anyone who brings me mcdonalds right now
like sometimes I wish I was allergic to latex so I wouldn't have sex with so many people..
Randomize
