U of I kids don't fist pump to Sweet Caroline. Get me the fuck out of here.
Married on the beach in PCB while blackout drunk. Bonged beers on the sandbar for a bachelor party. They shotgunned beers at the end of the vows. How is spring break allowed to happen?
The Ukrainian kid just told me that our econ professor wants to bone me. Please tell me that phrase means something different in Eastern Europe.
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
after watching ten minutes of "the decision," I conclude that King Lebron has more influence on America than Barak Obama. I love our countries values.
I'm slowing backing away from her. I tried breaking up with her and it felt like I was clubbing baby seals.
So I am just swinging blind here, but I am guessing that blood in your sinus is not ideal
Just got smoked out by my boss. Working in politics is great.
Can I just skip the lesson I have planned for tomorrow and just teach my students about Prohibition using my impending hangover?
This is why american education is failing
I'll pass on that plan. The lack of my penis in new vaginas is no where on the itinerary.
I'm sure there are thousands getting dick today in the name of independence
His exact words: "I don't have anything you can't treat with antibiotics."
He shit with the door open. I think that means we are in a realtionship.
Most people would agree that it IS in fact slutty to give someone head for free ice cream.
The shrooms were awesome. Everyone's bones in their face looked so beautiful! Everyone had great face structures.
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