That adds atleast one bjs worth of awkward sexual tension between us.
My life has literally become a dickpocolypse. Thank you, summer, I missed you.
So I came home baked last night and made about 60% of my jeans into jorts...
ive got a scarf tied around my face holding bags of hashbrowns to it, im too boss to care
If I buy you $300 worth of popeyes, will that make up for me trashing the house?
Important info for allergy season. An orgasm will unblock stuffy sinuses.
Remember when you picked me up from my walk of shame with a bike, I came out wearing a Ninja Turtle costume and you let me ride the pegs to thoroughly display the embarassment
I never thought your mom would see me throwing up on my hands and knees in your front yard
Yeah play it cool maybe put in a kissy face though let him know you're giving an invitation for his dick
Me and you. The most fucked up people on the planet drinking together. Hell yeah
The lady that was sitting beside me thought the best way to cheer herself up was to pet and ruffle my hair while crying and telling me her problems...
He drunk texted me what I think is two snails fucking on a mushroom. Is "you sick bastard" too mild a rejection?
I would drive 12 hours round trip for you to have an orgasm, cause that's friendship
I'm being hhit on by creepy guys please come one bought me a penis hat balloon animal save meeeee
You can’t judge a dick by its balls.
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