Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
Just got booted from water taxi for showing my balls to a security guard.
You should get sea herpes
I mean sea horses
I just smoked a bowl while riding a horse. This has been a productive vacation.
fter the third song from an iPod commercial played I realized how much that frat sucked.
Got to see someone fall down the stairs while holding hot coffee and a folder full of papers. Best Monday ever.
She asked if my windows were tinted enough for road head.
I know you're trying to keep the moaning to a minimum but the banging on the wall is totally giving you away
She's running around bumping into to people trying to keep a balloon she filled with vodka in the air. Please tell me she has a secret off switch you didn't tell me about.
If you hit me with your dick and make light saber noises we are breaking up. I don't care if it's your birthday, you are not a sex Jedi.
So is singing the star wars theme as I put the condom on off limits?
Annnnd I didn't even notice there is a guy dancing in a jock strap beside me. That explains girls smiling at me
So when I eventually, if ever, find someone I'd like to marry, do you think having people fly to africa for a lion king themed wedding is too much?
Im going to be coked out with hello kitty fire arms. Valentines day can suck my dick
At least I'm fat on the outside. You can NEVER change being fat on the inside.
She apologized again the next day. I said it was pee under the bridge
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