What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
Would you let Jessica Biel poop in front of you to see her naked...but you have to wipe her too?
I used puppy pads next to the couch for her to throw up on....
People are yelling about how much they want you here.
I'm going to change, vomit up my mexican food to save the trouble later, and then come meet you. Thrilled.
I just tried to eat one of my ear plugs, thinking it was a cheese curl. I need it to be break RIGHT NOW.
it's my birthday, i should be around people i want to fuck
You tried to fight everyone, so we kept having her take her shirt off. You were sufficiently distracted...
Brian got his first ever blow job last night. We should make him a scrapbook.
Well my summer started by me waking up in a tube on the side of the pond this morning with 2 of my friends. So that's good..
I need drugs. Hard drugs. Today. Not tomorrow. Today. Something relaxing.
She throws back shots like they are NO-THING. I swear, she goes through like five straight tequila shots, does a jello shot, chases with half a hot dog, has a rum and coke, and then takes her shirt off and makes an impromptu bandage out of it for fuckin' Tim who cut himself on the flagpole. I'm going to marry her.
Feels like I ran a marathon last night. A tequila marathon.
Wow two curved penises in one weekend. I feel like this may be good luck. Like finding a four leaf clover
I guarantee you he will only fuck with old bitches from now on
I broke my dick don't ask me how I need help putting in a catheter so I can piss.
Randomize
