Yo I'm just eating dinner now. U ready to go out?
Ya ya. Where you eating?
Cereal and beer. U kno u want in.
i wish peter jackson would direct porn
you laugh because clearly you have never had to clean poop out of a tub
dude, never let a drunk girl playbite your dick. the doctor came in laughed and left.
This might be the most awkward night of my life. And I had someone pee on me once.
we can add 'stealing hydrangeas from the sign in front of the credit union because we're too poor to have all of the flower arrangements professionally done' to my list of maybe-felonies
Taking shots with an iv of fluids in, because I work tomorrow. That's responsibility. Employee of the month right here.
Dude cabbage spilt on the floor, and now danielles rolling it. Happy st party's day.
His wife made me pancakes and let me borrow a clean shirt. Should I drop his class or use this to my advantage
I need to establish a pattern of dominance early.... I'm like a slutty Cesar Milan
You told me "I need to pound this drinks if I'm going to pretend his dick is big enough" then left. Dollar night quotes 2012
Dunno why I keep hitting snooze. It's never gonna give me the kind of sleep I need to be sober.
Woke up to a sex noise notice under my door...he gets a A+ for proformance and ill be seeing him again.
this is the fourth time i've taken my clothes off for money this year. is that normal for the average college sophomore?
never have sex with a mint flavored condom on. my vagina is on fire.
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