How is Miami?
Omk. I'm shitggaved om loincoln
I remember going home with 2 girls. Woke up with 4.
I love taking my adderall while im in class! As soon as I take the pill out everyone around me just stares in envy!
You hooked up with a kindergarten teacher?
Yea. It's kind of weird knowing that there are kindergarten teachers out there with their nipples pierced.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
terrible decisions. terrible terrible terrible decisions.
who'd you have sex with.
My roommate says its rare that you can be tear gassed before you lose your virginity so i feel accomplished in life
He literally chugged a bottle of wine in under 2 minutes. Stood up, said "fuck what ya heard" and stabbed the bottle into their drywall.
Drunk and alone at a magic show is what my life has become without you
I'm going to teach Troy such valuable life lessons. Yesterday I told him to stay away from girls who drink redbull and vodkas.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I accidentally agreed to be someone's surrogate
We have a little not a lot. We already rolled a blunt and named him Ron.
I'm spending my Sunday wishing the entire Patriots offense would let me touch their manhood
Did you mean to say flashlight? Or did your grandpa really give you a fleshlight for your bday?
its like i get a dick upgrade with every new guy i screw, at this rate i'm scared to see my next one
QUIT STEALING MY PHONE AND SEXTING MY MOM!!!!
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