3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
@ a funeral. fucking miss uuuu
im sorry but my first introduction to your dick isn't going to be a pic sent from the men's room
Although, to be fair, I am both willing and going to lick marshmallow fluff off of your dick.
He screamed "Hug me!" and dove into the bushes. How he gets laid every weekend is beyond me.
I just debated creating a mirror system so I could play Batman while in the bathroom. I think I need help.
I already knew that. But I also don't agree with stifling creativity.
Dude, I had to stop mid fuck. Her cat was swatting at my balls as I did her from behind. I couldve lost something.
I'm convinced my penis is the only thing holding this relationship together.
Future roommate keeps sending me pictures of cool shit she has for our dorm and I'm just like "... I have a set of Aggie wine glasses a great set of tits."
He told me how it ended, then I blew him.
So he ruined the best cinematic experience of your life and you REWARDED him??
You know your acid trip is going well when the orange you're eating gives you a life lesson
How weird would it be for me to get 1 hour photos printed at CVS of my partially or all nude?
I think next time I give head I'm gonna try making the chewbacca noise.
I look forward to it
Sorry didnt text you yesterday. had to put restraining order on my ex.
I cam home to find him twitching on the floor, surrounded by unopened condoms and covered in cranberry sauce (yes I tasted it) while Thundercats was playing.
Randomize
