my mouth tastes like poor choices
I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
Okay I'm all about any plan that ends with "We're gonna get you drunk."
So... I'm really sorry I tried to sell you to random people in cars last night
After the nose/jizz incident i think our relationship can handle anything.
I sent him a bunch of texts telling him that his beard wasn't long enough yet so we couldn't fuck and to text me back in a few hours if it had.
Come get your boy. He's cuddling with a bag of rice on the floor.
I told her the party couldn't handle my playlist LAZERBAWLS and I was right. Cops in the basement, orgy in the kitchen, jousting in the living room.
Is it unethical to trim my bush hair with the scissors from my office?
No one understands the complete and utter debilitating 3 day bday bender.
I'm crying watching Rihanna at the VMAs. Periods are a bitch
Last night he told me I was never sexier than when I was cutting pizza. Seriously. Like, he's perfect.
learning about efficiency and effectiveness in an administration seminar. real world application: walking across the street to the pub on break to shotgun a beer.
Hopefully he gets to dig deep into my body, before he digs deep into my past ..
my dad just built a flame thrower.. you should probably get here
Randomize