Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
Two words Indian burn...
What did she think it was, a shake weight?
There were 11 girls in that minivan and everyone was either puking, crying, or yelling "we're a total shit show"
I don't remember what happened but judging from the contents of my pockets it had something to do with potatoes and glo in the dark condoms
i'm sitting in class and looking at who would die if all the fans suddenly fell from the ceiling. i guess i have next year to pass history..
Waking up next to a 3 inch puddle of water in my kitchen with a bathing suit on...what the fuck went on lastnight
Lmfao I'm not trying to have a pissing contest over acid with my mom.....
You fell out of the chair and then lifted your foot saying, "If my foot could give you the middle finger it would."
It's def pee. WHY DO I PEE ON THINGS WHEN I DRINK TEQUILA
Reasons why I love cats more than people: 1. They're not fucking people.
Ok well i was gonna say you can only borrow my fog machine if you will use it to emerge from your room in a cloud of smoke after having sex with sarah, so yeah we're good
5% want to drink juice and feel better, 95% just want to touch your butt
Nothing but goodness could come from two friends getting naked. Think of all the good advice and other things we could give to each other.
If we both don't have awesome filthy sexual experiences to share in the morning...we are no longer best friends.
you fell asleep with her panties on your face. how are you surprised??
Randomize
