so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
She told me I reminded her of the fair. And she wanted to deep fry my dick and eat it.
sweetheart all i remember is you throwing up and saying "i thought things would be better now that barack obama is president"
that's almost as bad as that time i almost ashed in a baby carriage
look. either you want to have late night naked sleep overs or you don't. do not involve dinner and extraneous conversations in this relationship.
At my internship. I get drug tested tmr at 2
Are they going to pay you for the one day you worked?
I tried carrying you from the bathroom to your bed and you begged me to bring the toilet too
if I see a bottle of vodka right now I'll probably throw up gum I swallowed when I was a kid
We ate our feelings. Then drank our feelings. I feel feminism delivered.
Braid them armpits, sister.
Id prob hit it, but i instagram edited her picture to make her look better. Ha. She should fuck me just for that.
would it be uncouth to smoke a joint during office hours
This is why you're my favorite TA
If I end up in the hospital remind me to order jimmy johns.
Why?
They deliver.
The cat likes watching me spank Michael. I don’t know how to feel about this.
I just discovered my new vice. Cotton candy vodka. Its like a carnival in my mouth, puking of the tilt-a-whirl included.
My boobs are too perky to pay that much for a car
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