Aunt Jean just announced that her pubic hair is getting thicker as her head hair gets thinner. As a family we are just not a people of mystery.
Just got laid for the first time in 3 yrs, 10 mo, 1 wk & 2 days. YESSSS.
So one buddy got tackled at the urinals by national guard members and was arrested. Another had sex in a port o potty with possibly the drunkest girl I've ever encountered. The rest of us blacked out and won a few bets. So yes, the derby did meet our expectations.
halloween is SO much better on drugs, why didn't anyone let us know about this when we were kids
well in DOG beers, i've only had one
He needs to respect me before he can fuck me with cat ears on.
mind if i send you a dick pic? so you can see what she wasn't doing right?
i just keep picturing us drunk surrounded by kittens.
Yesterday was just the icing on the rejection cake that was my week
Sex on acid. Try it. I thought we were fucking in outer space with fireworks inside a rocketship car. Best.
So your brother is gay after all... Just caught him making out with my brother... Apparently he's gay too
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
Just because the energy drink is shaped like a grenade doesnt make it cool to throw it and yell "BOOM" and break my flatscreen, asshole
It was a great party. People were literally still doing shots and playing drunk Jenga at 6am...
Better not shit yourself at the gym.
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