So did the night end well for you?
I stole a traffic cone and drunk texted my sister because i couldn't think of any other girl to text
He started yelling "fuck the environment" then puked all over the baby trees
The google font looked peculiar last night, but then up close I realized it was just dry vomit.
Just sold a bike on craig's list for 4 four lokos and a 40. How bad do you miss college?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We woke up under the ping pong table holding hands.
I'm riding in a wheelchair, being pulled by a golf cart. You need to be here.
i lost his rear view mirror, your phone charger, and my lesbian virginity. 21 isn't shaping up too well so far.
posting about faith hill is really not helping you get me into your bed
We had him convinced Visine is flammable. He was genuinely freaked out that everyone would know when he was stoned.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you realize you insisted on them having a dance off to korean music to determine who takes you home?
I decided it might be a good time to stop when he requested I "bring that pussy over here"
I still don't know why she was so offended when I emerged from the bathroom and told her my balls were now clean.
You had sex with him AND his man bun. Like not just him but also the bun.
I didn't think you were that drunk until you were trying to rub your foot on my vag under the table at the thai place.
You’re a genius! I just walked in, shut the door, blew him and left. He could barely move afterwards and was a hot mess at the presentation. He already sent me a calendar invite for another meeting
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