Say something about gay babies.
She's got an ass you could write the declaration of independence on in one line. Takes up three bar stools.
If I had a penis, I would stick it EVERYWHERE. I don't know what these guys are doing.
Its official. 'Jingle Bell Rock' gives me a boner. Thank you Lindsay Lohan & Rachel McAdams.
she said she was living bicuriously through me.
NO YOU'RE NOT. I don't want to hear that SHIT. Jameson appreciation day part 1 is saturday and YOU WILL BE READY.
I feel I should make it clear.....I'm not stalking you, I'm stalking ur dick. You don't even need to talk when you get here. At 4am I think we'd both prefer that anyway.
It's like god touched my soul and said 'you will be great in bed'
i've never been that scared in my life. i ran naked into the corner and he just stood there trying to shield his boner from the light.
he shit on the floor last night i'm not venturing down there
The inflatable penis from those pics was mine... We broke him that night
So I just got drugs from a house with a giant cross on it. Thank you, Jesus.
I couldn't find the oven mitts so I used a thick stack of tortillas
You can make out without kissing
Explanation needed
Next time I think it’s a good idea to hook up with any of your wife’s family members or friends just kick me in my dick
Randomize
