I got date raped at Sigma Chi last night!
Dude, you never made it to Chi last night. You fell into a tree and passed out.
you made cement angels. it was a great sight.
Just hungoverly hit my funny bone with a hot straightener. Triple threat.
Some guy just yelled at me from his car "CLIIIIIIIIIITT"... I feel like this has something to do with last night....
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's a low moment when you're looking at your girlfriends tits on your daughter's phone..
Yeah I'd rather get obliterated at home.
Same here. I'd like to ensure that I won't get pissed on.
I slipped in the shower today and broke my lighter..
I mean we don't talk anymore but I still see him around wearing that sweater he stole from me after we had sex
You used a fucking bud light like as lube last night. I'd get a UTI test like stat.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude, who WASN'T thinking of motorboating her?
Pretty sure we had a civil war reenactment in your kitchen at 4am.
That would explain the cannon.
Let's say we can see the evolution of our "relation" by his name in my phone. Pizza slice emoticone. Pizza guy. Jordan. Jo. Jackhammer Pizza Guy. Jockhammer pizza guy.
poll: am I friendzoned if he just called me brochacha? on one hand, he called me bro, but on the other, he used the a to make it feminine.
For some reason, my alarm clock was unplugged & in the kitchen microwave. I don't remember doing that...
Found your brother. He was passed out in the tub holding a bottle of Shatto milk wearing nothing but his tighty-whities.
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