we had that weird still in bed morning after conversation. Her dad is the vp of my company.
His facebook interests include 'unstrapping velcro'.
herpes texted me again. he says he wants my vagina.
ok we should really consider changing this guys nickname...
They are baked and once again have spent the last 45 mins talking about opening up a world wide business called "pickle on a stick"
just got off the metro to throw up and got back on like it ain't no thang
really making moves this morning i see
He found my weave.. Think he'll still fuck me Friday? And how do I ask for it back?
It's not that drunk me is smarter; it's that sober me is secretly playing for the other team.
when I came to get Jamie there was a cop standing outside with her, made me roll down my window to tell me "she's got to go cause she won't keep her shirt buttoned"
Also can you rate on a scale of zero to jesus restraining order christ how creepy it is that he found a porn star that looks like me and has watched all the porn that she's been in
Kinda forgot to grab tampons. Mind if I run to my house to get one? I'd rather not turn my green skinny jeans Christmas colors
You know the cave of wonders in Aladdin? That's how I feel about his apartment. Except with blow and other treasures.
My ninety day supply of adderal just came in the mail and I literally just dumped all 180 pills into my hands and laughed like a maniac. Shits about to get cray
But really, someone with a penis give me attention before I start posting nudes on Instagram.
Look, all I'm looking for is a good time and someone whose chest I can bury my face in
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
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