Mom and Dad are dead. Trust fund
Have fun fixing the bed from last night Bob Villa.
At least you didn't call me Brittany this time
Ive never seen someone more dtf than a soaking wet drunk girl who stumbles into your backyard.
I'm having a chugging contest on the streetcar. The driver is judging.
Plus someone just passed me a joint through the window. BEST STREETCAR RIDE EVER
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
I found the perfect eye liner, it passed the blow job test, no smudging!!
We just shotgunned beers for America
Let's just say, at one point i got woken up at 4am by a naked guy who was offering me steak, in a cup.
The chick got into the cab with us and said we have 3 chances to guess what she just stuck up her ass. Hello to you to!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This guy smells like mr Rogers puppets and I don't know how to deal with it
One of the art pieces was basically this chick throwing raw meat at the audience, anyone who got hit (which I did) got a free shot of whiskey. It was worth it.
do you ever wish you could like, jerk your heart off and be, like, emotionally satisfied? it'd feel like cuddling.
Stop jerking off to vines my recommended list on YouTube is getting weird.
There's nothing more rewarding than telling you that I fucked your dad
Omg I got up from his bed and almost did a header into the wall because I came so many times I forgot how to walk.
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