My professor really needs to stop abbreviating. I'll never remember what "Fun. Anal. Trade-offs?" means when i study.
you turned your livingroom into a bong?
my being single is dangerous.
You kept making that girl eat peanuts, saying they were good for her baby..... I don't think she pregnant
He's like my sex unicorn. Elusive and majestic. I'll catch him, I'm baiting with patron.
I DON'T CARE LET'S GET DRUNK AND GO. I STRAIGHTENED MY HAIR DO THIS FOR ME.
Like some sort of pot growing robin hood.
Ong my arms are moving wo my consent
Could we try to replay the decision making process whereby only you and I bought and drank a keg this weekend? Because there were some fundamental flaws!
I'm in public and Taylor Swift is playing. It is taking all my effort to not screech like a goat.
Fuck you know you drunk when you start signing the Masson impossjvke song to entourage yourself to pee
is telling someone you can be his trophy wife the same as proposing?
When I get off work and you're not around to hang out with all I do is lay around in my underwear and eat potatoes.
you have 30 seconds to convince me not to grab this guy's crotch in front of his girlfriend
Where are you guys?
Drunk
Randomize
