Ps there is totally a drug addled prostitute in olympic pizza asking for change for a 100 bill
I just realized that my mother and I have the same favorite sex position, Guess which one!
OMG! Ew.
Lucky Dad.
Just saw a car with license plate GYPSYS that was full of gypsies
I just wanted to yell " i am not a shake weight!!"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If only guys knew how much awkward ass shaving goes into making sex this good...
There were gay boys and a jukebox. It was like god wanted me to.
I told him to keep his feelings in his pants because they're annoying and to just fuck me.
I've used my house key more to do bumps of coke than I've used it to get in my house.
I'm in this weird masturbatory haze making onion rings. If you want to come over we can eat these suckers and play TF2.
Why don't we hang out more often?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also, I saved your name as Everclear last night. No idea why I did that.
He puked in the middle of it and I still wasn't disappointed.
Dude I asked him to get me beef jerky at 4 am and he actually walked to CVS to get it. CVS closes at 12 but it was the perfect opp to dip out
He and his ex stood there talking about going to get Chinese food while I was half naked searching for my panties
She was all for the threesome til I showed her a pic of my boyfriend. I think I should re-evaluate my life decisions.
Apparently I told him the people made me order taco bell I didn't even want it. And then proceeded to turn off all the lights and sit at the kitchen table in the dark and told him not to look at me.
Randomize