these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
it actually wasnt that awkward...i planned on saying hello and walking away..then she asked if i wanted to go to lunch and i looked at her chest and said absolutely
can you wear a superman outfit if we ever have sex?
What baked good do you think says thanks for being a great tutor, lets bang?
I just found a babydoll head in my sink where we ripped it off and did shots out of it.
I'm applying temporary tattoos with green beer, this is the life.
I'm sure me singing - rather loudly - "fuck me in the back seat" last night didn't help either.
She called us while she was having sex to ask if we remembered to feed the cat
I dont understand how her boyfriend puts up with her weirdness
If throwing a bottle across the bar, hitting a skank in the head and not getting caught was an Olympic event, you'd bring merica the gold every time
I need Mexican food. Like, I'd take it through a needle at this point. It's totally worth the track marks.
It's a good thing my liver is flexible because a lesser man would be dead
I would literally only have sex with a dinosaur right now.
the next morning we realized we didnt speak the same language... guess i subconsciously did learn a little german last semester. thanks study abroad.
ah the experiences a semester in Vienna can give you. Frau would enjoy knowing that even while sleeping during class you still managed to learn enough german to get laid
so he'll eat food out of a dumpster but he won't lick your ass?
He was shirtless in my yard saying he was jesus
Randomize
